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  • Writer's pictureRaúl Villaseñor Gómez

ARTIST DIARY: NO DEBUT

Updated: Aug 16, 2022

When I made the decision to study plastic and visual arts I had two feelings, on the one hand I was happy because it was what I really wanted to do - I had previously studied international relations -, on the other hand I was a little uncertain because, although I knew that there were and are people who live from their artistic production, they are not the majority.



NOT AND EITHER

Living from what you love, whatever the choice, is not easy. Once I realized that art was my thing, I wanted it to be not only my vocation but my livelihood. After graduating, I embarked on a project with my best career friends that in the end did not work out, we lacked experience and we were at different times in our lives.

Later I went to study for a master's degree to broaden my professional horizons a little and the possibility of obtaining a better salary if I worked in an institution, but I didn't like it and I ended up dropping out in the first term. It wasn't what he wanted either.



FIRST ATTEMPT

At the end of 2019 I got my act together and started producing for an art fair where I had been selected, BADA 2020, which took place in February of that year, a few weeks before the start of the quarantine. My experience there was varied, I didn't get what I expected, but I didn't leave blank either.

Shortly after the fair I uploaded my website and opened my online store, I didn't sell anything, I lacked quite a few tools to make it work and I couldn't find someone to advise me. On the other hand, the context of the pandemic and the confinement wore down my spirits and I did not feel confident and experienced to carry out a company that I felt surpassed me.



RETURN…

We returned to Oaxaca in 2020. I thought it would be easier, but I didn't count on the wear and tear of confinement and the grief that comes after changing my life. The following months were very difficult, I was not at my best professional or personal moment.

At one point I had to ask for help and I got it. From there, little by little, I began to get ahead in both areas. Slowly but surely I got to work. I was quite afraid of failing again, I still am, but I realized that everything is part of doing something, no one is born with the knowledge to do what they want to do, it is a path and our responsibility in it is to learn from the experiences that occur to us and seek the necessary knowledge according to our circumstances.



… AND LEARN

This time I looked for training and I realized that you will not find everything you need in one place, you have to search in several, explore and adapt it to yourself, to what you want and need. Another thing that helped me is giving in to my impulse that everything be "perfect" because in reality nothing is, we do what we can with what we have, but yes, what we can has to be our best effort.

The challenge has been enormous and on more than one occasion I have wanted to run away... and sometimes I do, but I always come back to continue. I realized that instead of getting "everything right" at first, the best thing is to improve on what you build, in this way it is easier to get closer to your ideal.

***

This page is the product of work and dreams to live with dignity from my work. Artists are professionals like anyone else and our work is worth it. I do this because I want to establish a commitment with the people who identify with my work. Also because it is important for me to have a channel where I can communicate with people about art and the artistic experience.

As a community, we have failed to build bridges with people interested in our work, we tend to use unnecessarily convoluted and obscure language that deprives people of understanding what they want to see. I will do my best so that this does not happen and I will try to communicate in the most understandable and honest way possible.

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